The Alien Critic Reviews...
The Alien CriticReviews...

TAC Creates...C.O.L.U.M.B.O

Date Posted: 12/9/21


So as you may recall I mentioned in my previous article that I have been working on a pet project, pun intended, and have created a new life-form named Columbo. He is essentially the equivalent of a domestic dog and is currently in the form of a nine week old puppy. Unlike Abbie who was already in the form of a human woman, Columbo is a puppy who will grow to full size over the next few months.


I haven’t given him the ability to shape shift as I did with Abbie as she was designed to be more a my race/human hybrid. When creating her, I was able to use my own mind as a basic template so she could understand language, communicate, read, write and so on. My initial attempts to create a dog using the same methods failed as my mind matrix was unsuitable for the life form that I was attempting to create. I couldn’t create a full-grown animal so will need to start from the beginning training him as a human would teach a normal dog. As a result the little chap that I have made is essentially a blank slate that is basically capable of crapping on the paper but that is about it. I don’t think any attempt to download information into his noggin will work plus I have quickly come rather attached to the ball of fluff that pees all over the place so don’t want to put him at risk.


The reason for the name is twofold, first I am a massive fan of Peter Falk’s most iconic character Lieutenant Columbo and at some point I may do a review of that timeless classic but that is a review for another day. The second reason for the name is because like A.B.B.I.E, the name C.O.L.U.M.B.O is also an acronym which stands for Canine Organic Loyal Ultimate Mechanical Biological Organism.


You may be wondering why I have created him in the first place and the reason is quite simple, both Abbie and I wanted a pet. The trouble with domestic dogs is that they recognise that both Abbie and I are something other than human so during short interactions we are fine, but for any length of time they begin to see through our disguises. So getting a domestic dog would not have worked, which is why I made my own.


So there you go, I have only told you, my loyal reader (Gaz) because I may mention him in sometimes in my upcoming articles. I might even start my own dog training guide (I doubt it but you never know). 


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